Girls Talk : Vanity

Warning

This is purely girls talk.

If you happen to be a boy, a guy, or whatever of the said species, please feel free to skip this post.

I won't be responsible if you are bored to death.

Behind the Vanity Mirror
I've always seen myself as a plain, simple girl.
Or some may phrase it as bland, boring, banal.
Funky at times. Not at all lady-like.
(Kecuali part berpakaian, memang dididik pakai kain/skirt n tudung-guess the only thing which shouted the fact that - this is a girl la wey!)
[Vanity means excessive pride in one's appearance, qualities, abilities, achievements. I might abuse the term, though. Please don't vomit.]

Vanity #1: Youth
I do enjoy living my life, despite of the fact that my age is aging. Tak la muda, yet belum pon tua. Tak kisahla, life goes on, anyway...
Then, one fine day...
I met a nurse who said that she seriously thought that I'm 5 years younger 
I met mak membulat's neighbour who thought I'm a university student
Often, patient will say, mudanya doktor ni...
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #2: Beauty
I'm no beauty, let's face the fact.
Sebab tu tak pernah taruh gambar di blog, takut you all konpius dengan blog nenek kebayan yang bukan dari Gunung Ledang. Still, I know I'm not that bad, cukup dua mata, satu hidung, satu mulut. OK la kan?
Then, one fine day...
My senior mentioned, awak pon cantik apa...
My junior said, manisnya kakak ni...
Cikgu A kata, Saya suka tengok [puding karamel], putih (dulu la...)
Ok, walaupun mereka obviyesly hanya menanam tebu di bibir (haha)
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #3: Jewellery
I'm plain. Jewellery-less. Genetically inherited kot.
Mama jarang shower me with jewelleries. Zaman sekolah dulu, mak (nenek) ada beri barang kemas, tapi pakai seminggu je, kemudian tolak tepi. Bila ada duit sendiri pon, I rarely spend on jewellery, almost never, in fact. They say, jewelleries are girls best friend. Not me, indeed.
Then, one fine day...
I received a pearl necklace from Japan. Morita San also gave to my other friends in the CPR team.
Recently, dapat pearl bracelet dari member yang di Tawau. Ada unsur pemaksaan sikit di situ, haha.
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #4: Sweet words
I'm boring, with small number of friends. And (almost) no guy friends.
Bila saya tengok kawan-kawan diayat baek punya oleh kawan-kawan lelaki, I'd just laugh and walk away.
It'll never happen to me. Mark my words.
Then one fine day...
Someone said 'I really like you, the way you express yourself. You are different from the other girls'
A colleague said 'You are so nice. Whoever marries you is very lucky'
Berpeluh sikit. Divert baek punya.
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #5: Appreciation
Saya sangat biasa. I rarely leaves any impression on the others. Kalau ada anugerah paling TAK popular, the trophy will definitely be mine, and mine alone. Kalau ada orang yang paling tak dikenali, saya lah yang bakal menggunduli anugerah itu.
Then, one fine day...
Safiyyah wrote a post dedicated to a few bloggers, including mine, with a note 'Terima kasih kerana tulisan yang menyentuh hati'.
Dr T once said to my colleagues, 'How come you present like this? Do you never listen to [Puding Karamel] when she presented her case???' and when Dr K said, 'You are one of the best houseman I ever have'.
My patient said, 'Doktor di sini ceria' atau 'Disinilah kau bah. Saya sukak kau di sini'
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #6: Roses & Chocolate
Seronok tengok orang dapat bunga, tak kira la dari kawan atau family. Walaupun, deep inside, rasa wasted nye, baik dapat coklat. Lagi sedap kot...
Then, one fine day...
I received a bouquet of roses from a friend.
I received chocolate from my senior on a dedication day.
A beautifully wrapped gift box of chocolate from an ukhti.
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #7: Friendship
I'm (as said) the most unsignificant living thing on earth. Ada kawan, tapi jumlahnya tade la sebombastik mereka-mereka yang lain. Tapi yang ada, sangat  berharga.
Every fine day...
'Awakla besfren saya'
'Aku syok sungguh dapat kawan ngan hang'
'Uhibbuki fillah' atau, 'Saya sayang awak'
'terasa sangat dekat di hati..'
And the list goes on, endless...
Indeed, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #8: Brain
Saya ni sangat biasa, dengan kepintaran yang biasa.
Selalu jugak tak dapat jawab soalan specialist. Jarang dapat nombor 1 dalam kelas. Memang biasa-biasa.
Kalau masuk pertandingan jom pecah otak, memang tak pernah menang.
Then, one fine day...
Meraih segulung ijazah dari medical school dengan title 'Medical Doctor'
Best student di salah satu tingkatan di sekolah menengah
Dapat naib johan pertandingan catur (hohoho, tak sangka giler)
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #9: Position
I was a nobody. And would never be anybody. So, I thought. Kalau jadi doktor pun, doktor biasa je. Yang tetap tak significant.
Then, one fine day...
'Dr K bilang kamu yang menjaga KKIA'
Dalam perhimpunan pagi 'Mari kita dengarkan sepatah dua kata dari doktor kesayangan kita' (adoi, manisnya kata-kata)
Position sebagai doktor, merangkap yang menjaga bahagian kesihatan daerah.
Itu masih biasa, yang lebih berat...
'Sila bawa bulatan adik-adik ..... '
atau, ' [Mak membulat] harap [puding karamel] boleh mengambil amanah ...... '
Atau yang lebih berat, amanah dari tuhan untuk menjadi khalifah [2:30] atau menjadi penolong agama Allah [61:14]. Berat tak berat,kena galas juga kan...
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

Vanity #10: Proposal
Proposal kelihatan begitu membanjiri teman-teman rapat saya. Tak kiralah, proposal berkapel (errkkk ^^"), proposal bertunang mahupun proposal menikah. Proposal biasiswa, proposal melanjutkan pelajaran, mahupun proposal bekerja. I'm happy for them (honest!). Walaupon kadang-kadang ada twinge of jealousy sikit-sikit (biasala tu). I never dreamt that it will ever come to me, ever!
Then, one fine day...
Anda ditawarkan memasuki asrama penuh...
Anda ditawarkan biasiswa MARA...
Kemudian... anda diterima bekerja di hospital bla bla (yang ni wajib la. Dah kata doktor tak cukup)
atau, yang buat sedikit berpeluh,
'Saya ikhlas nak kawan dengan awak...'
'Mak cik nak ambil [puding karamel] jadi menantu mak cik'
'Ada orang tanya pasal awak' atau 'Ada orang datang meminang'
Sumpah berpeluh dan terpaksa buat adegan divert tak hengat...
Surprisingly, it does make my heart skip and bring a smile to my face.

The GREATEST vanity of mine: Islam
I'm a muslim. Sumpah. Tak percaya meh jumpa saya, akan nampak saya bertudung.
I/C pon stated agama Islam. Nama pun ada binti.
But deep inside, often the question arise...
How muslim am I, as a muslim?
How close I am to Him, the creator?
How well do I know my prophet, Muhammad? Not to mention sahabat, tabi', tabi' tabiin, ulama?
How devoted am I, living this syariah?
How proud am I, to carry the burden of DnT?
Still in search of the answers, in GREAT vain.
Pride and proud. Insha Allah.

'Allahumma ahsanta khalqi fa ahsin khuluqi'

[kredit]